Chris, I really respect this. Going into a relationship takes commitment and awareness. You're already ahead of the game if you are searching for a new approach. Mediocrity will not keep a marriage strong, you're right about that!

I think the best thing I can say is shoot for the moon. Solving the big problems requires middle ground, equal amounts of humility and love as the loudest intention.

When is the wedding? Or are you already married? I wish you the best. We should get some dating gurus on here! Advice!

Thanks Shea for the words. It's unreal how much truth is contained within such a small amount of writing but ur exactly right.  My wife and I have been married for  5 years and some of these things I am just starting to learn.

By the way, any thoughts on why it takes so long for women to figure out what they are going to wear???

Hi Chris,

My husband and I have been married for 19 years and it still takes me forever to find something to wear.  The reason, for me, is that I still want to look my best for him even after all of these years. 

Perfection?  Well, we try. I will tell you that honesty has been very effective.  There has been one thing even more effective than honesty and that is the promise that we made to each other to never belittle each other.  We have never called each other mean names even if we are just kidding around.  Names like dummy, stupid, jerk, or anything worse than that can be the kiss of death.  I know this sounds silly, but it has worked for us.  Good luck with your goal.